没有你的日子里：Day 5
在没有你的这几天里，我试着不去想你但我做不到。 好几次，我拿起了电话好想打给你却没勇气。不管我多努力的告诉自己我不能那么软弱，我就是这么软弱。我始终不能把你忘记。 一次又一次的争吵或许已经让你对我厌烦但是不管我们在一起5年或是50年，我对你还是一样，从来没改变过。自从我怀孕已来，你从来不曾问过我感受与感想。我知道你不想要这个孩子所以一开始我也没打算生。后来，我发现堕胎已经太迟了，我就想先自己生下孩子等你回来的那一天再告诉你。现在已经没有那个机会了。。我已经完完全全的失去你了。我一直试着把你忘记，但我身边却一直有着你的影子。记得星期日我到楼下去看医生，坐着坐着，就想起以前我们一起走过那条路，一起坐过那个椅子。看医生的时候，医生还问我是不是你的女朋友。她说她看到Benfred 就想到了你。我发现我越想把你忘记，反而就有更多的事向我提醒着你。为什么要这样对我？我不知道我到底做错了什么，应该得到你这种待遇。几年来，我都拼了命的去保护这个家庭以及这段感情。即使没钱，我也从来没有怨言。对于你，不管你骗我几次，我也都原谅你。对你，我没有要求，只想你对我一片真心，难道这也错了吗？在你眼中的我，或许永远都不是一个好的女朋友。但，你在我的心中却永远占去着一份特别的位置。在未来的每一天，也许你会渐渐的忘了我，忘了孩子， 可是在未来没有你的每一天，反而我会更加的想念你，更加的记得你。
I've told myself umpteen times that I must not be so weak, but I've failed. The more I wanna forget you, the more the surrounding reminds me of you. I took my phone wanted to call you, but I've no courage to do so. Initially, I thought that I could bring the 3kids up while waiting for you yet now I realize I've lost you thoroughly. You're just gone and you won't be back anymore. I don't understand what have I done to deserve you treating me this way. All these years, I tried my best to protect this family and our relationship. Towards you, no matter how many times you lied to me, I forgave you once and once. I've no request towards you, just hoping that you can treat me real. Am I wrong to ask for this? In your eyes, I might be a imperfect girl with all flaws but in my heart, you stand a special position. Maybe one day in the future, you might forget me, forget about the kids but I will remember you in my heart as the day pass.
